It will be so nice to have 2 incomes. My baby fish are ready to sell and I have a few people interested. I got sick last week, went to the doctor and they gave me antibiotics which I'm not taking because antibiotics suck. I'm feeling much better tho. X-rays show that my lungs are better than before, AND it also showed I have a slight scoliosis. My heart and lungs are fine. NO WONDER MY BACK IS ALWAYS FUCKED UP. Dammit. Good thing about my heart and lungs tho. One less ulcer. If I could sleep at night I might actually be ok.
Ok, I am starting to feel better. I have been kind of anxious about something tho. There is a guy friend of mine who is going to come stay with me, from michigan. I think he's a really great guy, and I'm going to help him out. But I'm so used to living alone, I just don't know how things will work out. I am hoping he gets a job fairly quickly. I am going to do my best to help him find a job, but Olympia sucks for jobs.
Since I started smoking again I get to see my friend Kathy that I used to work with over in the other building. It's been almost a year since I've been able to talk to her on a regular basis. She was having some kind of family problems for a while, and I didn't hear from her. I was really pissed off at her, but I can understand detaching yourself from others for some periods of time. Another girl I used to work with over there just landed a really nice job with one of the clients, I am so happy for her, she deserves it.
So I have a shitload of betta babies that are getting to be old enough to sell. I guess it's time for me to figure out how to sell them now. I have to get a business license and all that. I hear it's cheap, like sixteen bucks. We'll see how that works out.
My weekend wasn't a total disaster. We made pot oatmeal cookies. They were really good. We thought it would be best to eat two and see how it hit us, we woke up about four hours later. I was pretty upset that he took the rest home, didn't even save one for me. Pfft. I've gotten alot of work done today, been able to answer all the questions people have asked me around the office. I guess I'm the techroom Linux guru now. I'm having alot of fun with FreeBSD tho.
I am supposed to have company from out of town this weekend. Took an extra day off of work.
On April 11th I told myself that I was not going to each chocolate for a year. Not that I completely love chocolate or anything, it's just a thing I eat sometimes. I am doing it as a test of self-control and discipline, something I am totally lacking. I got the idea from an ex who gave up pizza for a year. I know things have been low, and it's been really shitty that I started smoking cigs again, but I know if I give up and have chocolate, I am probably very close to killing myself. I am contemplating going to the doctor next week, I don't want to go back on medication but I do not want to die either. I really feel like it is out of my hands at this point.
ART/TEMPERANCE "the creator, the alchemist" You achieve balance and integration through the creative process or by working with the hands; you have a deep love for your creative expression which is inspired by your great perception and emotional insights. You love truth and beauty for their own sakes. You have the ability to balance and blend masculine and feminine, yin and yang, reception and assertion. Remember that the highest art form is that of artful relationships.
I keep getting annoyed lately. It feels like everyone wants something from me during a time when I just want to be left alone. I fear damaging friendships but how can I care when I don't even give a shit whether I live or die? Work is just something I do in between sleeping and IRCing. I will have company this weekend. I need time to reflect and to meditate, and to create.